We’re all aware that social media is a carefully curated highlights reel; a fact that’s been amplified by the ‘Instagram versus reality’ trend that’s taken over our feeds in the last six months. Copious numbers of influencers and normal people alike have posted photos comparing their carefully posed and edited ‘grams alongside more natural photos of themselves to demonstrate that what we see on our screen isn’t always as it appears to be. The problem with this narrative, though, is that it’s wrapped in shame and the age-old patriarchal practice of pitting women against each other. Thankfully, a new trend is sweeping Instagram: ‘reality versus reality,’ which aims to demonstrate that flexed, posed, or relaxed – our bodies are still our bodies, and they’re perfect in any form.
This is why 'body positive' can sod off and let 'body neutral' make us feel truly empowered
Influencer and journalist Danae Mercer is one of the women leading the charge, writing on Instagram: “I don’t care if you POSE FOR PHOTOS or if you just hang out. Because posed or relaxed, arched or slumped, whatever you do with your body, it is STILL YOU.”
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I̶n̶s̶t̶a̶ Reality and ALSO REALITY / I don’t care if you POSE FOR PHOTOS or if you just hang out. Because posed or relaxed, arched or slumped, whatever you do with your body, it is STILL YOU. And it is STILL worthy, still amazing, and still REAL. I talk a lot about how SOCIAL MEDIA is not real. It’s filtered and curated, filled with thousand of tiny moments and precise, popped, perfected snapshots. I’ve said repeatedly how I’d love to see more wiggles and jiggles on here. More human folds and skin dips. And while we’re at it, more nuanced vulnerability and raw emotion. But never once have I said the people DOING these POSES are FAKE. Shameful. Wrong. Or that ONLY the folks rocking their cellulite are REAL. I’m fine with women doing both. Either. Neither. Whatever. Because here’s the thing: Empowerment feels different on every woman. How we choose to show up and express ourselves echoes in millions of unique ways. And instead of focusing on what divides us, Or wrapping SHAMING in a shiny new package, We should look at what it means to empower one another. To support each other. And to step out of some stupid patriarchal framework that says other women are competition and that differences must divide us. So today, cowgirl, if you want to pose, you go pose. If you want to let it all hang out, you do that too. However YOU own your body is incredible. What matters is that it feels AUTHENTIC TO YOU. Not to the gal next door. Not to the images you see on social media. But to YOU. In your head. Your heart. Your raw human soul. Only you can know that, truly and deeply. All I’m asking is that you show up. You be yourself in whatever wonderful way. Because that? That’s the kind of REAL I want to see on here. x #selflove #instavsreality #selfacceptance #feminist #iweigh #mycalvins #womenempowerment #womensupportingwomen
A post shared by Danae | Angles + Self Love (@danaemercer) on Aug 22, 2020 at 6:12am PDT
Moreover, the trend is a lot more inclusive than its predecessor, as body positivity advocate Militza Yovanka explains in her caption: “Dear people on IG.. When you do your beloved “IG versus Reality” images do not, please, forget that us curvy women do not get to suck in our stomachs and look like what society defines as IG models.”
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Dear people on IG.. When you do your beloved “IG versus Reality” images do not, please, forget that us curvy women do not get to suck in our stomachs and look like what society defines as “IG models”... We do not wake up after a day of bloating and get to be a size 2 again. Us curvy girls when we share our posts there is no bloating going on... There is no “I gained 5 pounds during my vacation and that’s okay”. What we get when WE post our beautiful bodies (in any position) is thousands of comments recommending us diets, shaming us and our bodies in ways you could never imagine. I get the intention behind those posts, I understand it’s important for all the young girls out there that are on the skinnier side and following you to see those posts but there is NOTHING bad with the posing or not posing , there is nothing wrong with anyone’s body at any time. SO PLEASE can we make sure to not forget that a lot of us bigger women no matter how we stand WE have a belly showing, WE have bigger tights and bigger everything’s including big hearts and spirits? And god knows there is A LOT OF US. No one can be the ambassador of every single movement out there and we need to be okay with that, we need to be okay with saying that when you’re an actual model it is a lot easier to be “vulnerable” on social media about little things that you dime not perfect about yourself, because the people that follow you would do anything to look like you. It doesn’t mean you never get your struggles with confidence it just means that you recognize that for the HUGE majority of women being proud of their bodies is followed by a lot of hate, shame and humiliations, and if anything all the YOUNG girls and WOMEN everywhere that follow us need to be reminded that their bodies are perfect even if no amount of sucking your belly in can hide it. PLEASE learn to Love your body in all it’s shapes and particularities the more you love it the more you will want to do what’s right and healthy for it ❤️ If you compare your body to others, if you don’t love it you won’t ever do what’s right for it. Define your own standards for yourself, and be proud of it! ❤️
A post shared by Militza Yovanka (@militzayovanka) on Aug 23, 2020 at 3:24am PDT
She goes on to explain: “there is NOTHING bad with posing or not posing, there is nothing wrong with anyone’s body at any time. SO PLEASE can we make sure to not forget that a lot of us bigger women no matter how we stand WE have a belly showing, WE have bigger thighs [sic] and bigger everything’s including big hearts and spirits?”
As we all know, angles and lighting have a huge part to play in how we look in pictures. Jeenie from keepfit.women encourages her followers to accept their bodies in every state: “It’s not even Instagram vs. Reality, though. It’s reality vs. reality...This is your body, looking different within 0.007 seconds as you turn briefly in the mirror.”
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“One minute you can be enjoying what you see. One minute you can catch a mirror glimpse that has the potential to derail you,”she continues. “Your body is literally like 1% of your being. Don’t forget that. We are 99% everything else and like, 1% physical body.”
The ‘Instagram versus reality’ trend could be interpreted as saying that the ‘Instagram’ version of ourselves is more socially acceptable and that the ‘reality’ is somehow inferior– which does nothing to help women’s self esteem. The things that may be considered ‘flaws’ in the second picture aren’t and by aligning posed photos with relaxed photos in the newer version of the trend, women are re-framing this by demonstrating that both are versions of the same person. The ‘reality versus reality’ trend is empowering because it removes the divide between women and shows that we are all equally valid and worthy, whether we’re posing to high heavens in a brand new outfit or prefer to take snaps of ourselves looking comfy, slouched and letting our bodies just be .
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